Thursday, September 3, 2009

Listening to the Music

Continuing in my reading of "Ruthless Trust". First I so love how the one who loves me provides these readings when I need them most. I am grateful.
Manning relates being mindful with listening to the music all around us every moment. Everything we hear is music, even the silence. Or maybe I should say every noise is music because many times I don't hear it because I don't listen for it.
All of this is another way to say don't worry about tomorrow. Live in today. I become so focused on what WILL happen or who I WILL be instead of embracing what is happening NOW and who I am NOW.
(digression - now don't interpret what I am about to say as being stupid)
The past doesn't really matter. The future doesn't really matter. For all I know there may be no future for me. All the time I allow myself to worry either about the actual tomorrow or next year or 5 years is such a killer. No, I mean a killer. It kills my joy. It kills what is happening now. It kills the wonder of the moment. It kills the blessing of the now. It kills part of me. It kills the music.
We have decided to rent the house. The decision process of the last few days has been hard. One minute I'm so happy that we will be moving forward. The next I am so scared. No jobs. No income. No equity to cushion the decision. But I am trying to listen to the music of today. I can't be paralyzed by not knowing if the renters will be good renters; will something happen to the house because of the crazy wet weather up here (which is always a part of life in the Pacific Northwest); will we able to sell next year or the next?
The music today is playing a song with lyrics that say: take a walk, a slow walk with Ollie, rejoice that you will soon be moving, enjoy the food you have for today, sit by the window that looks into the trees and just be.
I'm going to work on this today. Just today. Tomorrow I'll listen for the music again.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Nice, Cathy. Sit and soak in the music of today. It will be gone too soon and then another tune playing. There is beautiful music to be had in the last few days you have in the PNW so let the notes refresh and inspire you for the next stanza about to appear.