Friday, February 20, 2009

Hospitality

Everyday I pray a prayer that I have written. And I mean everyday. It ends with asking God to make me what I wish I were, what I hope to be. Mostly this has to do with being hospitable; with being a welcoming person.
One of the most impacting readings I have done from the Rules of St. Benedict is about the porter. He is the one who opens the door to anyone who comes to the monastery. He is to either say, "Thanks be to God" or "Your blessing, please" to each person who enters. There is never to be an inconvenient time to visit the monastery. This has shaped so much of my reflection for many months.
A week or so ago I began reading The Wounded Healer by Nouwen. The theme has come face to face with me again. Let me quote:
"Hospitality is the virtue which allows us to break through the narrowness of our own fears and to open our houses to the stranger, with the intuition that salvation comes to us in the form of a tired traveler. ....Like the Semetic nomads we live in a desert with many lonely travelers, who are looking for a moment of peace, for a fresh drink and for a sign of encouragement so that they can continue their mysterious search for freedom." Oh God. This is not just so many people out there. This is me.

"God make me be what I wish I were, what I hope to be" This is what I hope to be. I think more than anything else. This is loving my neighbor as myself. I find myself out of words.

5 comments:

Kim Becker said...

Thanks for that post. I am also struggling in a similar way. I really want my house to be a place where people can come and feel comfortable. I want my kids to be able to bring friends over and hang out. I just find it hard with some of my kids' friends. I really don't enjoy them being around and I'm not very hospitable with them. I don't want to be that kind of parent. I want to be inviting and inclusive to all. God help me!

amy said...

In a geographical desert, withholding hospitality to travelers literally means "I don't care if you live or die." In a desert, those with food, water, and shelter are beholden to those who do not. Few travelers could cross the desert otherwise. Hospitality is the recognition of our common frailty and our common worth, that we are all equally needy and equally valuable.

For many of us, this motivates us to welcome others as guests in our homes. But hospitality is a much broader attitude that does not recognize such categories as us's and them's. We are all in the desert of sin. Some of us have water and shelter to offer. Hospitality means caring if others, based only on our common ground of shared humanity, survive this desert journey.

An interesting study on this looks at the symbolism of "heaping coals on the head" as a symbol of hospitality. That imagery is likely a reference to the way that desert travelers and nomads would share fire with each other as a means of staying warm and safe during desert nights. They would pile hot coals into a vessel which was carried on the head (as vessels are often carried) that were then used to start other life-preserving fires.

anonymous said...

As long as I remember who really owns the house, it makes hospitality much more bearable

catd said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
catd said...

Amy, hmm, that certainly changes the way the church has loved using the "heaping coals of fire" on our ENEMIES to show them how righteous we are?